Naugthy Jokes - Funny and naughty adult sex jokes!
Mar
21

200 Bucks

written by Funnyjokes

One day an at home wife is alone and the doorbell rings.

She opens it to a guy, “Hi, is Tony home?”

The wife replies, “No, he went to the store, but you can wait here if you want.”

So they sit down and after a while of silence the friend says “You know Sara, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I’d give you a hundred buck just to see one.”

Sara thinks about it for a second and figures, what the hell – a hundred bucks! She opens her robe and shows one to him for a few seconds. He promptly thanks her and throws a hundred bucks on the table. They sit there a while longer and guy then says “That was so amazing I’ve got to see both of them. I’ll give you another 100 dollars if I could just see the both of them together.”

Sara amazed by the offer sits and thinks a bit about it and thinks, heck, why not? So she opens her robe and gives Chris a nice long chance to cop a look.

A while later Tony arrives back home from the store. The wife goes up to him, “You know, your friend Chris came over.”

Tony thinks about it for a second and says, “Well did he drop off the 200 bucks he owes me?”

Mar
17

Skiing

written by Funnyjokes

Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren’t enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, “I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!” The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he’s had the same dream, too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, “That’s funny, I dreamed I was skiing!”

Mar
8

Married 3 Times, Still Virgin

written by Funnyjokes

A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, “Please be gentile, I’m still a virgin.” The husband being shocked, replied, “How’s this possible? You’ve been married three times before.” The wife responds, “Well, my first husband was a gynecologist and all he wanted to do was look at it. My second husband was a psychiatrist and all he wanted to do was talk about it. Finally, my third husband was a stamp collector and all he wanted to do was…oh, do I miss him!”

Mar
1

Dog, Cat & Penis

written by Funnyjokes

A dog, a cat, and a penis are sitting around a camp fire one night. The dog says, “My life sucks, my master makes me do my business on a fire hydrent!”. The cat says, “I don’t think so, my master makes me do my business in a box of cat litter.” The penis outraged, says “At least your master doesn’t put a bag over your head and make you do push ups until you throw up!”

Feb
26

Sucked dry

written by Funnyjokes

A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, “When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?”

The husband replied, “All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry.”

Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, “What are you thinking now?”

He replied, “It looks as if I did a pretty good job.”

Feb
19

Exhausted

written by Funnyjokes

A young girl came fully exhausted and tired after her honeymoon night.

When her friends asked her what happened, she replied :

When this 70 year old bastard told me that he had saved a lot from last 50 years…I thought It was MONEY..!

Feb
15

Call Girl

written by Funnyjokes

Two men went to a callgirl.
The first one went in and came out, and he said:
“Nah, my wife is much better.”
The second one went in and came out, and he said:
“You are right mate, your wife is much better!”

Feb
9

Kids

written by Funnyjokes

A boy and a girl of class 2 asked their teacher:
“Can kids of our age have kids?”

The teacher replied ” No, of course not.”

Then the boy said to girl :
“See, I told you not to worry!”

Feb
3

The Maid

written by Funnyjokes

A man cheated on his wife by making love to his maid, and while doing it, he exclaimed: ‘You are sweeter than my wife!’

The maid then smiled, and said:
‘I know, because the driver always tells me so.’

Jan
31

Funny sex drawing

written by Funnyjokes

Here’s a funny sex drawing, also called a “hentai” drawing, created by a female artist names Vanja.

Remember to visit her hentai site!